1. Thou shalt not be silent

Honest and CLEAR Communication is sooo important in any relationship.

Don’t shutdown, escape or ignore one another.

Worst of all don’t just go along to get along.

One person in any relationship tends to be the alpha / dominant one.

So if you are not “wearing the pants” you must speak the funk up or you WILL get yo azz ran over! Then you will most likely blow your top once you are fed up and just run away AKA fight or flight.

2. Thou shalt not use superlatives

Don’t say you always do this or you always do that…it’s not usually the case.

There may be a pattern of an annoying behavior or habit that annoys you.

Ask yourself if this is really worth you getting pissed off over. Something such as forgetting to shut the door after your spouse takes a dump or not putting the dishes away correctly may bother you but is it worth nagging your spouse about it for the thousandth time after ten plus years of marriage?

Begin to consider if there is something deeper causing you to nag so much about petty sheeet? Do your best to get to the root of the issue.

3. Thou shalt not release thy family business

Be careful about sharing your marital issues with friends and family members.

When sheeet hits the fan these people will take sides.

They may mean well but they can give bad advice based on their own struggles in relationships. Would you take advice from a friend who is single, a married friend who is contemplating getting a divorce and hates her husband or a Mom who has been married 3 damn times?

I’ve lived through all this sheeet and am speaking from personal experience, if you could not tell already.

One big exception on this is related to abuse whether physical or verbal.

Yes, I said verbal because a woman may not be able to beat up a man physically but she can beat his azzz up mentally, emotionally and most of all verbally.

In the case of abuse, try to seek a mental health professional and separate yourself from the situation for a while for a cooling off period.

4. Thou shalt not withhold sex from thy partner

Ahhhh…my favorite commandment, LOL. I can see the all of the eye rolls now.

Sex is a good barometer for measuring the health of a marriage.

This ties back to Commandment #1 related to communication.

Ladies…being on your period is not an excuse to not engage in intimacy with your partner. You betta put a towell down or not be afraid of felatio. Just cuz your Mom was a prude and told you the Monica Lewinsky act was a sin doesn’t mean you have to follow in her footsteps. Again, that may be a big part of the reason why her azzz is single.

As Jada Pinkett said, if you are not giving “it” to your man regularly someone else gladly will.

Men and women like to be mentally stimulated before anything.

Sex is more than just intercourse.

Sex should just be a byproduct of great communication.

Also, don’t be afraid to be adventurous …just cuz you go to Cirilla’s a few time doesn’t mean y’all are going to hell and that’s all I’m going to say about that commandment.

5. Thou shalt not keep secrets

I sucked at keeping this commandment.

I would sometimes …well often, do something that I knew my ex-wife would be upset about. I didn’t think it would be a big deal.

Even though she had the gift of discernment, as most women do and already knew about what I had done. I still thought that somehow I could get away with my white lies.

Women just want the confession and her trust for you gradually decreases to the point where her mind will go haywire wondering what else you are not being honest about.

Don’t be afraid of confrontation or going along to get along no matter how bad the offense is that you committed. The truth will come out sooner or later. Whether before or after your divorce.

Women lie too! Y’all are just better at it and good at justifying it, LOL.

One more thing. Trust is a two way street…if a man doesn’t trust you with his heart, he will never be 100% honest with you. Also, sometimes people lie and do certain things to drive you nuts on purpose to eventually force you to kick them out of your life.

Bottom line…humans suck at clear, effective communication. Mastering this skill will save you from a whole heap of trouble.

Thanks for reading!!!

Please share this with a newlywed couple or anyone you think might benefit from these 5 MARRIAGE COMMANDMENTS.

Also, feel free to share any additional commandments you feel should be added to this list.

Checkout the video version of the above post at https://youtu.be/GlLa64GTagI

And the other video I did on my other 5 MARRIAGE COMMANDMENTS here:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4V_Jg64yFPM

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Like it

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THANK YOU IN ADVANCE FOR YOUR SUPPORT AS I CONTINUE TO PRODUCE CREATIVE VALUABLE CONTENT

If only I had known what I know now yesterday

Maybe tomorrow

Or even today

Would be my last

What would I say

Where would I go

Who would I hang out with

What would I eat

Who would I call

Most of all

What would I write

As I lie here

I’m left with lots of questions

And absolutely zero answers

Contemplating the idea of dying

✍🏾

Don’t dm me

Text me

Call me

Don’t bother to ask me anything

Unless

Like Grandpa used to say

You plan on contributing

This not a suicide note

But rather a note to self

A reminder of how quickly you can forget what it means to exist

Those moments filled with bliss

As you exited your mothers womb

Greeted by excited smiles

Unconditional hugs

Genuine kisses

A seemingly ancient existence

Letting go of figuring out my future

Pondering my past

Passively allowing serendipity decide my fate

Painstakingly piecing together a peculiar puzzle

Pausing to discover the hidden path

Accepting the gift of a precious present

Presently comfortable in my own presence

Embracing figments of an unimaginable essence

✍🏾

Contemplating the idea of living

With absolutely zero questions

And lots of answers

Lying here

Writing about the thought of dying

Calling no one

Eating trail mix

Hanging out with an iPhone and my favorite Beatstrumentals

Going to my own funeral

Saying an emphatic eulogy

It is my last

Today is all I’ve got

There is no maybe tomorrow

If only I had known what I know now yesterday

🤦🏾‍♂️

By Aaron J. Yancey

© 2019

6.27.2019

5:30am

2pm

Part 1

I was at what appeared to be a hospital

I did something to make this black dude upset with me

He threatened to shoot me

I got scared told security and everyone he had a gun

Everyone laughed and said the gun was fake

Part 2

I was at the home I grew up in with Mom

Pop

And Wayne

I looked outside and saw a big tornado that was really close

I yelled to the whole family to get ready because the tornado could strike at any moment

They all were walking around very nonchalantly and seemed to not be worried

Mom and Pop stayed upstairs

Wayne went ahead and walked down to the basement

I went down too

Then quickly went back to my room to grab some valuables such as

My wallet

Phone

And a big blanket to wrap up in

Part 3

I was at what appeared to be Aunt D’s house

Trish was not there but most of her family and my side of the family was there

I had these little cousins I was playing with

One of the kids was rapping really well

And I told his older brother they should record his rapping before his voice matured and was less high pitched

They laughed

I saw my Step-Dad Mickey

Nicky’s daughter Kalen was there

So was Nicky

I walked out into this garage to leave the party

I held the door open for cousin Will as everyone followed

Part 4

My high school Bball coach Steve took me to this guy to get some sort of delivery driving job

Steve had this cool sky blue big classic car

Almost looked like an Impala or Cadillac

The guy took my application

But never gave me an answer

On if I got the job or not

He was a middle eastern looking guy

4 am to 12pm

Scene 1

My Pop

Wayne

And Ma

Were all with me to purchase some shoes

Ma tried to convince me to buy these black and red basketball shoes

I think it was because they were cheaper

Only about $40 to $50

I told her I wanted these shoes from a different store in the mall and Pop was ready to help me

She steady kept shoving these Bball sneakers in my face

A fireball of rage swirled in my stomach

Rising directly to the top of my head

Before I knew it

There I was strangling Mom right there in the mall

I could feel a state of mania taking over

Big bro had to pull me off her

I yelled to everyone I was moving back to Houston to live with Wayne

Scene 2

I was at a gym watching a performance of some sort amongst a group of people

One of the people in our group was breathtaking

She reminded me of Halle Berry but a little lighter

Shorter and with curly hair

She had a smile that melted my soul immediately

It felt like we were in school and it was time to go to the next period

We decided to go hide behind a big black stage curtain

Gazing into each other’s eyes

Before long gently kissing

Talking

Her telling me she was divorced too

If only this weren’t a dream

Was it a foreshadow of a woman to come

Or just another projection of my imagination

Scene 3

Looking at Map plotting to go back somewhere in the U.S. Eastern middle of the map

Scene 4

There was definitely another scene but I totally blanked out

July 18, 2019

6 am – 1 pm

Part 1

I was riding a motorcycle really fast on the highway

I don’t know exactly where I was going

Traffic was flowing pretty quickly

There were a few times I had to hit my breaks

Eventually this cluster of about three other motorcyclists were near me attempting to race

I started to join them just as the cars all hit their brakes and traffic came to a halt

The motorcycle I was on looked really cool dark and very sporty

Randomly while riding on the highway I saw someone paying for something via Square Pay

I started to think that Square Pay would be the primary form of payment in the near future

Part 2

I was staying somewhere and needed a drink

I walked into a nearby gas station and ran into this guy who started to be overly friendly and guided me to a drink

I really wanted alcohol or something else but he directed me to the fountain drinks and poured me ice water in a big styrofoam cup

Part 3

I was sitting by myself at this round poker table in the middle of a different gas station

Once again I was craving some alcohol really bad

These cops and a manager stormed through the store questioning people like the Gestapo about stolen goods

Part 4

I remember riding in a car and hearing someone playing country music

Part 5

At some point I shared a hotel with my big bro

Part 6

I got a reply email from the old limousine company I used to work for saying they are excited about me returning to their company

Copyright © 2019 Aaron J. Yancey

#dreamdiaries #dreams #diary #diary #diaries #prose #writer #blogs

Dem changes

Will funk a brutha up

Drowning in a bottom bunk

Who woulda thunk

We’d return to this winnowing wormhole

Swallowed in an inferno essence

An ever present drifting blight

Shining on me

Then passing me by

Burnt to a wisp

Left lukewarm

Wandering lips dry

Pulled into pieces

Scattered behind

Riding off into bi-space

Where we three belong

Waving at Umbrellacorns

And peliguins

With the wind in our face

Orbiting platonic planet

At supersonic warp speed

Copyright © 2019 Aaron J. Yancey

#pennypoems #Poetry #poetsofinstagram #poem

June 17, 2019

3am to 11am

Part 1

Went on a road trip with Snook

Drove to Cincy or something like that this time

Had to leave Snook and go back home

He was not happy again

We had an argument

Part 2

Was amongst some gang

Was apart of a shootout

Had two handguns in each hand

None of my shots actually hit or killed anyone

Ran out of bullets

I don’t even know who we were shooting at

Or which side of the shootout I was on

I climbed out of a window

Tip-toed on a ledge

Almost jumped off the building to avoid being shot

Part 3

I was sitting down at a picnic table

Getting ready to eat some weird frozen sandwich

The sandwich was a vegetarian one with peppers and spinach and cheese

I was amongst all of these artists eclectic looking homeless people

Some black dude was grabbing food out of a big freezer

He looked a lot like the rapper / bouncer Negro Scoe from the Riot Room

I remember talking to this pretty white lady

Part 4

I was working at this company

Sitting at a desk

There was a black dude training me

We helped people with financial checkups

He let me handle working with this black lady

The black lady asked for a simple financial checkup

She had about 3 kids with her that kept being rambunctious

I pulled out a yellow notepad to take notes just as the dream changed scenes

Part 5

I was in the same office alone with that pretty white lady from the picnic table earlier

She started flirting with me and letting me touch her in forbidden places 😉

Then the girl suddenly turned into my sister in-law who is black

We were getting ready to have relations

Then she asked me if I had a rubber glove

I was solid as a rock

Then had to start hunting for a gold glove amongst piles of my junk

Finally I found one

Then the dream changed just as we were about to proceed

Copyright © 2019 Aaron J. Yancey

#dreamdiaries #dreams #diary #diary #diaries #prose #writer #blogs

Swipe

Swipe

Swipe

Swipe

Swipe

Left

Right

Left

Yo Left

Yo Left

Yo Left

Right

Left

Try to be funny

Not too crazy

Her name is Andy

Is she really a lady

Oh sheeet

She enjoys Thundercat

Been listening to Drunk a lot recently

Also plays Gin Rummy

I’m in love

I’ve found my second wife

MAYBE

I’m not much of a mountain climber

But we both like to ride bikes

I’ll introduce her to trap yoga

Slowly educate her on other black people stuff

Just after traversing Roanoke hill

Subtly swoop in requesting the number

Drop a witty gif via text

Along with a yogi pose

To expose the best parts of my body

While keeping it strictly platonic and classy

I need to do some push-ups nightly

Still working wit deez sad chicken wangz

Joke

Joke

Joke

Goofy pic

Close it out

She’s got work in the mornin’

I don’t

Game

Set

Match

Till tomorrow

Eventually

Whether through her being nosy

Like a detective searching for something dirty

Unfortunately

I’ll have to disclose a few important facts

Just like I did with Ginger’s fine self

And a few others

I have fo kids

She doesn’t

At least they are all by the same baby momma

As if that will truly help my case

I currently don’t have a job

Have just over one hundred dollaz to my name

No car

Bi-polar

A recovering alcoholic

And living with my momma

Oh should I dare mention the four recent trips to jail

One of which for watering and restraining

And almost strangling my baby momma

Don’t forget to mention the restraining order

Mmm

I think I’ll stick to one word answers

All the while praying she never reads this blog post

We shall see how far it all goes

William Jewell

Plus Liberal

Plus Atheist

Plus dog lover

Plus rock climber

Plus 28 and unmarried

Plus Scientist

Equals slim chance of this working out

But she’s hot

Interesting

Funny

Sexy and nerdy

Two of my favorite qualities

Did I already mention she likes Thundercat

And plays Gin Rummy

Oh and Vulfpeck

This ought to be very interesting

Channeling the Black Mamba Mentality

Going Ten for thirty like Kobe

Just keep shooting

Copyright © 2019 Aaron J. Yancey

Photo credit Akyanyme

#pennypoems #Poetry #poetsofinstagram #poem

12:06 AM

Monday July 17, 2019

Dear Leutinant D

As of today you’ve been officially demoted

You are no longer Commander of this domain

Your shenanigans have gotten the best of me

I can no longer blame it on the alcohol

We’re in treatment

Or depression

We’re taking pills now

Or lack of self- control

That’s what prayer

Exercise

Meditation

Yoga

Writing

Vlogging

Blogging

Therapy

Etcetera are all for

So even though I can tell you’re visibly upset

I don’t have a single regret about this decision

This will hurt me more than it will hurt you

Trust me

In the long run

You’ll thank me

Cuz when we finally have dat date with Halle

Or Keke

It will be worth the wait

#ddiaries

I’m a single father of four

My kids live with their Mom

Currently I’m unable to see them

I had to get right first mentally after a tough divorce with their Mom

I wrote this as a late birthday present for my youngest daughter Ava

I’m sure my other three will get a kick out of it and I hope the kiddos in your life do as well

#newbook #comingsoon #staytuned

June 1, 2019

Sleep Goal – Peaceful rest for eight hours straight

Sleep Primer – Axelrad & Alley Kat

Sleep Aid – Apple Music Vibes Playlist

Sleep Time – N/A

Wake Time(s) – N/A

Part 1

I was at a wedding

My big bro and I were crashing it as uninvited guests

The party seemed to slow down as if time turned into slow motion

Projections / holographic humans began noticing an imbalance

As we reached to grab a couple brochures

I mentally scrambled for a name to drop

Necessary to validate two fools rushing in to smash the wedding feast

Trish’s cousin Willie Jr. was there

His wife looked totally different

She appeared to have gained a lot of weight

I never actually went over and talked to him

For some reason I was slightly intimidated

Instead I spoke to his co-worker

From Burns and McDonnell

An old head joked that some call it Bernie Mac

But he warned that it shouldn’t be referred to as that cuz it’s disrespectful to the late famous comedian

The coworker I talked to was super short with his answers

He was being an azzz

I got upset

Decided to storm out of there

With no car

No place to go

My big bro just let me leave

Figuring I would most likely return

And I did

Part 2

I hopped on a train

One of those light rail Metro trains like in

San Diego

My buddy Snook and brother Wayne were on the same train

They sat next to each other and talked

Joked

I had a LSAT book and a backpack

I abruptly got off on one of the stops just before it entered a dark tunnel

But left my big LSAT book on the train

I decided to wait for the train going back to the place we came from in the daylight

I needed that book to study

As I waited on the other side of the tracks

A few pretty older ladies in dresses approached the same platform

Waiting patiently alongside me

When the return train arrived Wayne was in the car but Snook was gone

He told me how Snook was very funny

Just as I had told him

He could see how someone like him could easily get so many cookies

Countless warm bodies

A smile and a joke goes a long way

No matter how ugly you are

Not that Snook is ugly

Just something I’ve noticed over the years

Wayne didn’t have my LSAT book

He said Snook had it

My mission was now to find Snook

I was compelled to start studying for this test again

Part 3

Just before the train incident I was sitting in a car

There were kids playing everywhere

With no parental supervision

A cop walked by

It was late

Well beyond the city curfew

I assumed the cherry berries would sooner or later admonish us

But they ignored our restless raucous

Like we were invisible

I knew I couldn’t sleep in the car

It felt too dangerous

I asked my sister in-law Michelle if I could sleep on her couch

She hadn’t cleared it with her husband

But she said she was sure it would be fine

I told myself I’d set my alarm

Wake up at 5 AM before he saw me on his way out the door to work

Part 4

I was in a basement

It was dark

Scary

Felt like I was in one of Kanye’s nightmares

© 2019 Aaron J. Yancey

@aaronjyancey

#aaronjyancey

#yanceysdreamdiaries #aaronjyancey #dream #dreams #dreamer #dreaming #diary #diaries #journal #journals #journaling #writing #write #writer #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness

Some call it an illness…I call it my superpower 💪🏾

At age 30 I had everything

Now at 32 I’m starting from scratch

Discovering I had a mild form of bi-polar disorder was liberating and saddening all at the same time

Here is my story…

👇🏾👇🏾click here👇🏾👇🏾

maniak documentary on YouTube

.

.

.

.

Created by @aaronjyancey

.

.

.

.

#documentaries #documentary #maniak

#vlogs #vlog #blog #blogs #bipolar #bipolardisorder #bipolarawareness #mentalhealth #mental #mentalillness #superpower #superpowers #communication #relationships #show #shows #anomaleaguetv #aaronjyancey #zeroacrefool

2:56 AM 5.27.2019

As Ice Cube would say

Today was a good day

I just arrived home about an hour ago

I stayed up all night

Writing

And like a nerd

Singing Karaoke in my big bro’s living room

All by myself

LOL

This single life is liberating and lonely all at once

I’ve learned that I need a balance

There is nothing wrong with being alone

But after a while

I must interact with a few clones

Big bro has been letting me tag along on all his adventures

This morning he took me to his Trap Yoga class

It’s yoga plus trap music playing in the background

The instructor was a super cool light skinned dude wit dreads

I want to be like him when I grow up

I was a little tired because of the lack of sleep

But I was running on adrenaline

It was a great time

The gym was filled with beautiful brown people

With a few sprinkles of white faces

One snow bunny in particular caught my eye

I was somehow able to maintain my focus

It’s so interesting not always feeling like a minority everywhere I go

So far everywhere I’ve gone I am part of the majority

It’s a mighty strange feeling for a boy who grew up in St. Louie

I have not stretched that much since my glory days of HS bball

My chest does not feel as tight as it was before

I’m assuming all of the breathing and relaxation relieved my stress

There was a place back in KC called Nella Yoga

It’s black owned and I will definitely go next time when I’m in KC

I will also be doing more yoga going forward

Most likely starting tomorrow morning

I’ll just watch some YouTube vids

Oh boy

And there were some sexy ladies

If I wasn’t leaving ATL soon I might have made a move

I’m only making long game moves going forward

I mean if the opportunity avails itself

I’ll never turn down a peach proposition

Or friendly fellatio

That’s a whole other conversation

On the way home Wayne had to make a few stops

Grab some groceries and boxes

I was passed out

As soon as we hit the house I crashed for a nap

Woke up and did some more writing

Worked on my next book

Let’s just say it’s a diary about my married years

Oh

I started my old vlog #sos or #speakoutsundays back up

It’s just an open forum allowing people to get all in their feelings

I think there should be more open forums online that allow people to share their stories

Or personal challenges they are dealing with in life

Not everyone can afford therapy

I know some people are not comfortable sharing intimate details

I don’t mind and I’ve notice the more I open up the more others are okay with doing the same

There is a healing that takes place between two such beings

I had one guest and look forward to making this a regular thing again

Onto a bonfire downtown

I saw food trucks

And tons of people wearing these lit up headphones

It reminded me of the scene at the end of Ready Player One

Except everyone had on VR goggles

I’m looking forward to that future forward

My brain spends 90 percent of waking life in fantasy land anyway

Apparently the special headphones allow the people to tune into individual DJs at the event

There was also Reggaeton playing

A few nice women twerking

Definitely different than any bonfire I had ever been to

I was able to see cousin Domino who brought a friend name Tedra

We laid down a blanket

Sat behind a barbecue pit

As I taught them how to play rummy

Wayne’s friend Zan showed up with two of her lady friends

One had these long Poetic Justice braids

The other was a hot thick redbone

She’s supposed to be at this karaoke event tomorrow

I think I’m going to make a move and just see if there is an open door

You only miss the shots you don’t take

After the bonfire we hit up the WaffleHouse

I had a $2 cheeseburger with pickles and grilled onions

And a tea-monade

It’s really an Arnold Palmer

Wayne and the sistah circle were laughing at me

For not asking the waitress Melba for an Arnold Palmer

Tea-monade is exactly what the menu said

From now on I’m calling dat drank Tea-monade

Especially whenever I’m around Destiny’s Child

Domino and I talked more about our tumultuous dating situations

We’ve definitely come a long way from playing house

Or other kid games at Grandma’s house

At times it all seems so surreal

Errrbody growing up

Living like grown folks

Responsibilities and relationships

Fun times

Tomorrow

Or today I should say

Is going to be an even better day

I can feel it in my bones

© 2019 Aaron J. Yancey

@aaronjyancey

#aaronjyancey

#diary #diaries #yoga #trapyoga #trapmusic #goodtimes

Speak Out Sundays is an open forum that allows for transparency and honest communication. The goal of the ongoing vlog / show is to make people from all walks of life comfortable with sharing their stories and discussing any personal challenges they may be facing. If you’re interested in being a guest on the show, please dm me on Instagram @aaronjyancey or email me at yanceyaaronj@gmail.com.

Watch the full episode here on YouTube #sos

#sos #speakoutsundays #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #vlog

My fam is dysfunctional as fuck

But you’d never know from the outside lookin’ in

I’m just waitin’ for the day

When we can all be honest

Errrbody quits hidin’

Boldly sharin’ deez secrets

I personally think

That’s the only way

We can each find true healin’

Transparency is

A dyin’ art

I get it

There are certain parts of me

I still struggle to share

Surprisingly

The only reason really

Cuz I’m worried

Can’t risk the legal ramifications

Of such criminal infractions

Never been to prison

Hope I never have to

Please

Errrbody

It’s time to stop fakin’

And start releasin’

© 2019 Aaron J. Yancey

@aaronjyancey

#aaronjyancey

#shhh #poetry #poem #poems #poet #relationships #healing #honesty #restoration

This is the life you chose

Don’t go cryin’ now

Regrettin’

Remember

You refused to be her

Bettaman

All you had to do

Is follow all her rules

Be Preston

Proudly play dat tambourine

Wearin’ dat monkey suit as Mister

Bettaman

But naw

You had to break dat lease

Quit job after job

Let go of dat damn leash

Don’t you feel

Betta…man

© 2019 Aaron J. Yancey

@aaronjyancey

#aaronjyancey

#bettaman #pennypoems #poetry #poem #poems #journal #diary #diaries

May 23, 2019

Sleep Goal – Have a dream about something cool and remember it when I wake up

Sleep Primer – Rummy with my new homie Brooke and a book called Tune in Anytime by Caroline B. Cooney

Sleep Aid – Silence and the sound of my somewhat strange new temporary roommate snoring

Sleep Time – 11 PM

Wake Time(s) – 2 AMish and 6:30 AM

1 – I had a water hose and I was up high spraying people in the face below. These people appeared to mostly be family and friends with lots of white faces. We were all about to play a game. I lived in a large beautiful home with amazing landscaping. This guy riding with me to my home saw that I had some debris in my yard and pool and was nice enough to help remove it.

2 – I had several golf balls painted like pool balls and I was stuffing them simultaneously down a chute inside a wooden box contraption. The people at the bottom were getting frustrated because they were overwhelmed with so many balls landing on their face at once.

3 – At some point a big ole bowl of cereal (fruit loops I think) was involved in this dream but I can’t fully remember the details.

4 – There was a PYT Asian girl. We were getting ready to root as the Aussies say, but I had no raincoat. We considered still going forward with spontaneous arrangement but opted to wait.

Thoughts and Interpretations

The first part of this dream makes absolutely no sense but all I can gather from it is that I’m about to get a phat house and make it rain.

According to Dreamstop.com, balls represent hardships and trials. This young lady I’m friends with was just telling me earlier in the day that she was playing pool. So that could be how the idea of pool balls seeped into my subconscious. Pool is a much easier game than pool as it requires less concentration, physicality and overall skills.

So the transformation of the balls could mean that my hardships and trials are becoming less methodical and easier to tackle. This makes sense because I finally was able to see a psychiatrist and get medication for a mental disorder that was negatively impacting my ability to function in “normal life”.

The fact that I was dropping the balls on other people below could mean that I am letting all of these hardships go and releasing them on other people that may be able to help.

We ate Fruit Loops for breakfast at the mental health facility I was vacationing at for the last few days.

I’ve been horny AF lately. It’s been a while. I’m still adjusting to this divorced life. I went from enjoying steady predictable peach a couple times a month to scavenging for it at the most unpredictable times. Oh well, we gon be aiight. God knows my heart.

© 2019 Aaron J. Yancey

@aaronjyancey

#aaronjyancey

#yanceysdreamdiaries #aaronjyancey #dream #dreams #dreamer #dreaming #diary #diaries #journal #journals #journaling #writing #write #writer #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness

If I had the cure for a broken heart

I’d mix it in a tumbler of Crown

Bottle it in Unforgivable

Package it in a box of Ruby cloves

List the directions in Raheem DeVaughn lyrics

Say the side effects in French

Sell it for a quarter in Kum N Go bathrooms

Advertise it behind a homeless romantic

Resting and writing on a faded park bench

© 2019 Aaron J. Yancey

@aaronjyancey #aaronjyancey

#thecure

#relationships #love #pennypoems #poems #poetry #poetsofinstagram #poet #art #artist #artists #sketch #sketches

5.21.2019

Sleep Goal – Just have a few dreams and remember them. My sleep has been thrown off between the long road trip and all the festivities this past weekend.

Sleep Primer – Magic City in ATL

Sleep Aid – Silence

Sleep Time – 3 AMish

Wake Time(s) – 6:15 AM

1 – I had a wild hallucination where I could see the storm trooper statue in my big bro’s apartment changing faces. The faces got scarier and scarier. The only way to describe these faces is something between demons and Chinese dragons.

2 – I was walking through a large apartment complex getting ready to hangout with my ex-wife. Once again, she made it into another damn dream. I first was going to pickup my socks that were randomly on the ground. A bunch of white people were looking at me strange like I did not belong in their neighborhood. Out of nowhere these cops yelled over loud speakers for everyone to freeze and that they were looking for a suspect involved in a robbery. I immediately began running for the fences to escape and not have to answer any questions.

3 – I ran into this strip of restaurants. I was going to use the bathroom really quick inside of one of the places but there was a long line. I decided to keep walking through a hallway to another area. I saw women in the air doing trapeze acrobatics. One of the ladies was superbly beautiful. I started to walk over and talk to the pretty redbone, but I was blocked abruptly by another guy that was also trying to talk to her.

4 – I walked into the mental health counseling center I was going to for a while to tell them I was moving to another state and would not be able to continue going. One of the young white female caseworkers there gave me a pen and paper to write my forwarding information down. She got really close and put her face next to mine so I knew she was interested in me.

5 – I was at the mental health counseling center eating lunch with the group. The lunchroom slightly felt like a prison with a bunch of long tables. They put a bunch of yummy appetizers out for us to eat. I made sure to grab the chicken strips before they were all gone. Some of the people there were upset about something but I can’t recall the reasons why.

© 2019 Aaron J. Yancey

#yanceysdreamdiaries #aaronjyancey #dream #dreams #dreamer #dreaming #diary #diaries #journal #journals #journaling #writing #write #writer #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness

I have a close friend named Fred

He caught his wife

With another man

In his own bed

Honestly

One of these three

Should probably be

Dead

© 2018 Aaron J. Yancey

#freddiesdead #oldshit #poetry #poem #poems #poetsofinstagram

12.11.2018

I want to be the greatest writer of all time

I want to be married again

Nawww

Funk thot

I want to buy my family a home in 2019

I want to be a billionaire

I want to help people in my life

Provide opportunities to be an entrepreneur

I want to be a full-time entrepreneur

I want to home school my kids

I want my kids to start their own businesses

© 2018 Aaron J. Yancey 

#daydreaming #oldshit #poetry #poem #poems #poetsofinstagram

11.13.18 8:30 PM

I remember how warm it was

To be back in my own bed

Our bed

You could make a boo boo hut hospitable

The message should have been unequivocally clear

After all these years

There is nothing that compares

It’s rare to find something

Someone so valuable at such a young age

A well respected man recently asked

What exactly is impostor syndrome

I realized it when I returned home

In every space I’ve ever known

I felt as though I didn’t belong

© 2018 Aaron J. Yancey

#blamethegame #oldshit #poetry #poem #poems #poetsofinstagram

11.13.18

The great comedian Chris Rock declared with great conviction

A man is only as faithful as his options

My problem from the beginning has been that I always had too many

I’m not talking about women

And no I don’t swing that way

We can save that part of my story for later

I’ll say everything I need to say while leaving so much a mystery

This is a love story

Beginning and ending tragically

Well temporarily

Maybe

I blame the game

The pressure to just be

Let alone a black man

Not allowed to ever be weak

Too prideful

Ashamed to get help

Until

It’s too late

Arrested

In jail posting bail

Back in again

And again

Finally free to speak

Freely

Without repercussions or penalty

We were both wrong

As Ye and Legend loop

Provoked and duped

This is my unbelievably fascinating side of the scoop

© 2019 Aaron J. Yancey

#blamethegame #oldshit #poetry #poem #poems #poetsofinstagram #pennypoems

1.2.2019 11:19 PM

Hear I am at Lonnie’s tavern

A new ritual after a long day at the Crazy Cake Factory

Still getting used to this always being lonely with no lady

My two favorite ladies

Marj and Margo don’t seem too in the talkative mood

I’m seriously thinking of pulling a Holden move

Paying a prostitute just to talk

Instead of requesting

Sexual favors

I’d ask her how much for a long walk at Freedom Park

Picking reading poetry and picnics as my happy ending

© 2019 Aaron J. Yancey

#oldshit #poetry #poem #poems #poetsofinstagram

1.3.2019 11:38 PM

Today I was tempted by a nice triple scoop

Of vanilla gelato

There I go again imagining her

I mean this beautiful bowl of white ice cream

Spooned

Consumed down to the last drop

But instead we talked

I told this smooth and creamy

Refined treat

My whole damn life story

And even though this flavor causes my

Bowels to be inflammatory

I dream of just one opportunity

To start all over

As the days get colder

And I flip lucky quarters to tell me my fate

I pray you will allow me to enjoy you

For at least one date

Too late

Hopefully tails just means I’ll have to wait

© 2018 Aaron J. Yancey

#scoopz #oldshit #poetry #poem #poems #poetsofinstagram

#dreamdiaries by Aaron J. Yancey

May 15, 2019

Sleep Goal: Envision the next direction in life and my perfect work situation

Sleep Primer: Watched a documentary on Netflix called A New Economy just prior to sleeping

Sleep Aid: Fell asleep to a documentary on Netflix called The Truth About Alcohol

Sleep Time: 7:25 AM

Wake Time: 5:30 PM

Part 1 – I was in a public bathroom and had to tinkle. I was trying my best not to drop the baby girl I was holding tightly in one arm as I used the other arm to unzip, “handle my business”, then wash my hands with soap. It was awkward to see actual women in what originally appeared to be the men’s restroom due to the visible urinals. I was tempted to ask one of the ladies I saw to help me hold the baby while I relieved myself really quick, but I was able to manage. The baby was a little white girl probably only 8 months old. She was sooo cute! I don’t know who the baby belonged to, but for some reason I had the responsibility of watching this baby for the day. When I kissed her on the forehead, she spit out her little green pacifier and she looked up at me smiling from ear to ear.

Part 2 – Before going to the bathroom, I had passed through this great big rotunda where this white CEO of a corporation (I don’t know the name of it) was giving this big speech to a bunch of people. I was tempted to stop and listen, but I opted to just go straight to the restroom. I had just left a classroom full of people. I cannot remember what the class was about but I do know I was sitting on the left side in the front row. The baby was not with me while I was in the classroom. It’s like the baby just magically appeared once I was in the hallway on my way to the bathroom. I had this thought that all of the ladies in the classroom would be drawn to me once they saw me caring for this baby. The students in the classroom appeared to be in their late teens and early twenties.

Part 3 – I was adamantly having this conversation with this young black guy how more people should write books. I told him about the five short stories I had already published and briefly explained how easy the process was on Amazon.

Part 4 – My darn mother in-law somehow managed to appear in my dream again. It appeared to be a flashback to the dream I had yesterday where I was in some office building with her and a few young women she was mentoring.

Part 5 – I was on a highway walking on the side that was facing oncoming traffic. I originally was with a group of people then eventually I wandered off by myself. Someone gave me a random grey cotton winter glove and skull cap. I kept wondering why they only gave me one glove instead of two.

Thoughts and Interpretations

I wish I could remember more but instead of fully waking up between parts 3 and 2 of the dreams I rolled back over to sleep for a little bit longer. I prefer to keep dreaming more even though it usually means sacrificing the amount of detail I’m able to recall in the dreams.

According to Zolar’s Encyclopedia and Dictionary of Dreams the 15th of the month means your dream will come true in 30 days. It also says that the beautiful baby is a sign of happiness. That’s the second dream now recently that had a baby in it. My Mom suggested last night that I consider seeing my Uncle, who happens to be an urologist, to get snipped. I already have four children all by the same woman from my first and only marriage. Ever since my divorce and failed attempt back in August 2018 to work things out with my ex-wife, I have fantasized at times about having more children. I don’t want to completely close off that possibility, but I’m definitely in nooo rush to have more children. I still need to hire a lawyer to correct my current child support situation. The baby in this dream was clearly white and looked nothing like me, so I was caring for someone else’s child. The baby girl could have also represented all of the responsibilities placed on me at a young age.

I don’t know what the classroom could have represented. I am currently scheduled to take the LSAT on June 3rd, but due to some recent complications beyond my control at this point, I will not be taking that test. I am actually relieved as I’m starting to think my heart was not one hundred percent in the whole pursuit of Law School. Law School is like this burden that will always loom over my head as I will consistently wonder if I should or should not do it ever since I attempted to go back in 2009 but didn’t due to my mediocre score of 147. I’m sure the fact that I need to still cancel the test with LSAC and get my partial refund is weighing heavy on my subconscious mind.

Having my Mother In-Law in my dream again I feel is significant. I don’t know if it means I need to talk to her or that there is still some unresolved anger toward her lying below the surface. We didn’t argue in the dream, she was just there.

According to Zolar’s, finding a pair of gloves means early marriage and wearing a new hat is related to wealth. Traveling on a road is associated with security and long life. I don’t know what to make of being given only one glove, facing traffic and leaving the group of people I was originally walking with, other than that these all seem to be signs that I will continue to face opposition and the road to wherever I’m going in life won’t be easy.

Thanks for reading! I’ve been keeping a dream journal for about a month now and I actually look forward to sleeping. Dreaming is more exciting than real life to me and I feel like this new routine is all having an impact on how I approach my life while awake.

The hallucinations I had while out in California and the nightmares I was having afterward prompted me to start keeping a dream journal. I wrote about this experience in my latest book, One Night in Chinatown, which you can check out here:

 

I highly encourage you to start keeping a dream journal and make notes of differences you feel it’s having on your daily waking life.

Feel free to email me directly at aaronjaredyancey@gmail.com or comment on this post below.

Tags: #dreams #dream #dreaming #dreamjournal #journal #journals #journaling #diary #diaries #writing #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness

© 2019 by Aaron J. Yancey

 

 

View at Medium.com

“Many men attempt to protect their lover’s heart by deception, being discrete, and creating some of the best lies ever recited, instead of being monogamous”

– William H. Person, Impostor: A Journey to Monogamy

Just call me Urrrsher

Cuz I’ve got a confession to make

During my delightful and docile decade of marriage

I was a serial cheater

Before you get all bent out of shape

Please keep reading

It’s not as bad as it sounds

Let me explain…

 

I was a serial “virtual” cheater

I’m talking with women like heather hunter

And the cougar who dressed up like Sarah Palin

Lisa Ann

Caught in a billion dolla web of x-rated internet

It was one of my largest downfalls dooming me to divorce

I constantly would lie then confess

Or try to hide only to eventually be caught

Women are natural born detectives

I never got away with anything

After all the tired apologies and failed promises to stop

My now ex-wife was fed up

If I had married #vanillagelato

#chunkymonkey

Or even #neapolitan

Based strictly on years of observing interracial relationships

I could have gotten away with a few hundred more funk ups

But she was #cookiesandcream with #chocolate tendencies

She had enough of my bullsheet

As Robert Sylvester Kelly sang

When A Woman’s Fed Up

There ain’t nothn’ you can do about it

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Beggin’ like Mary Jane Blige and Biggie for one more chance

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Or Cryin’ like Jodeci

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Unfortunately

Would not bring her back to me…

 

Is watching p0rn within a monogamous marriage relationship cheating

I’m curious to know how you all feel about this

And would love to read your comments below

Or take a quick moment to answer this one question survey

I’ve heard many women say no to this question

I discovered #dingasaur and p0rn around the age of 8

Church attendance and Bible reading made me view this as a sin

Thus beginning the life-long cycle of attempting to break my addiction to dopamine

 

 

 

 

 

 

Able to go cold turkey months at a time

Praying and trying my best to channel that pent up energy elsewhere

Attending recovery groups at church

Which they always seem to have for men

Not women

I guess women are not ashamed of B.O.B. as I am of #dingasaur

 

 

 

 

As I was reading Impostor: A Journey to Monogamy

Initially I didn’t one hundred percent relate to the Author

Hearing each sexu@l escapade freed me to feel less ashamed and dirty

I’ve always been admonished not to compare myself to the X-rated exploits of other men

Holding myself to an unrealistic cultural and self-imposed higher pious prudish standard

#billygstring had some wild personal testimonies

You have to read the book to find out who that character is

 

 

#billygstring had the kinds of Too Short Freaky Tales I imagined having as a teenager

If only I was just two to four inches taller

https://youtu.be/z63fnMzKTwo

Had a better jump shot and made the b-ball team at Truman State or Bradley University

Cue the classic scene from He Got Game

he-got-game-jesus-gets-a-taste-of-what-college-is-like-for-the-student-athlete

You’ll have to search for the actual P-Hub clip on your own

I enjoy toeing that invisible line but I’m not trying to have my website flagged

I just hope those of ya’ll discretely reading this at work don’t get in trouble 😉

One of my many nicknames in High School was actually Jesus

I at times showed glimpses of basketball greatness

I hated playing defense and was a very streaky shooter

senior stat line

I definitely never scored two #snowbunnies at once like Mr. Shuttlesworth

I had several opportunities to cheat with real women

Especially while at #whitemanbank

As I perfected my best #whitevoice

 

Pulling tips from How to Succeed in Business without Really Trying

Quickly climbing my way up that lousy ladder

My autonomy increased tremendously

The women got prettier and prettier

I was also packn’ a p-card / purchasing card

Capable of taking any woman I wanted on a lunch date

As long as it wasn’t some fancy place like The Capital Grille

To discuss business of course

I once heard a pastor say he tries to never be alone with a woman other than his wife

Well in the corporate world that’s darn near impossible

Between golf outings

Happy Hours

Business trips

The list goes on

Temptation is errrwhere

You also get to know some of your co-workers on a very close level beyond just work

I distinctly remember being alone in a car with a Snow Bunny in marketing

An attractive young widow

Maybe I’m bad at reading signals but my Spidey #sexsenses saw an open door

I never knew of my Pop cheating on Ma while growing up

His example made me always value monogamy

Plus I did love my ex-wife

She was my best friend

We met in college

She was a senior

I was a freshman

We had practically grown up together over those 10 lonnng years

I could never imagine hurting her like that

Now I understand why my therapist says he thinks Corporate America hates families

The closest I came to actually cheating on my wife was toward the end of our marriage

It was an emotional affair of sorts

I FaceTimed a young lady for approximately four hours

Venting about all of my personal and professional angst to a woman I barely knew

 

As I read the quote at the top of this post and made it through the remainder of the book

It forced me to ponder ways I felt like an Impostor

On my own particular journey back to monogamy

It feels like a necessary part of rebuilding my nest

So I’ll be prepared for whatever special relationship comes next

I’ve been divorced for nearly two years now

During that span of separation my ex-wife and I tried to work things out at one point

I also had a few flings

From chickenheads to thoroughbreds

At times I felt like I was making up for my twenties

I didn’t really do a whole lot of sowing my royal oats

I like a whipped fool got married at the tender age of 20

 

Impostor: A Journey to Monogamy made me laugh

And also ponder various encounters I’ve had with women

Before

During

And after my divorce

Dating at 32 is definitely not like dating at 22

Especially when you have a baby momma and child support

 

I’m looking forward to continuing to create conversation around this book

Feel free to follow me on this journey

As I share my favorite quotations and reflections

 

You can learn more about the author and purchase a copy here: http://williamperson.com/

 

© 2019 by Aaron J. Yancey

I have an honest confession to make

Usually on Mother’s Day

I try to pretend like it’s just another day

My Mom and I have always had somewhat of a rocky relationship

I won’t really go into the reasons why

I’ll save that maybe for a diary entry

I’ll just say that she is basically the black version of Ray’s Mom on Everybody Loves Raymond and many times we have not seen eye to eye

There are also several suppressed emotions that have bothered me over the years

I became more aware of these negative feelings during my freshman year of college as my future ex-wife who I was dating at the time began pointing more and more of my Mom’s manipulative and cunning ways out

I had become oblivious and desensitized to them just like my Pop

But rather than deal with them

I have been passive aggressive

Even though my current counselor says there is no such thing

Either you are aggressive or not aggressive

Some of us are just more covert special ops about releasing this aggression

Others are more direct similar to Donald John Trump

Like all those years when I did not get my Mom a gift or even call

I would replay this tape in my mind of bad memories reinforcing my selfish vindictive behavior

To some people they would probably think I was crazy if I began to explain further

Most people are thankful just to have a mother

I mean I could have grown up in a foster home

All those years of listening to her brag about the flowers she received from my brother

Her favorite child

All parents are guilty of this even me

She’s not even discrete about it

I saw the screen saver LOL

I had to hear about those damn flowers the few times I did manage to make that call

My grandma does the same thing

I still love them both

I’ve always hated Mother’s Day

Not because it’s another Hallmark Holiday

But because of those bad memories I’m always forced to recall

For a long time I’ve associated so many negative feelings with my Mother

Recently I watched the movie Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

It’s a great movie that I highly recommend

You can watch it for free here… http://vexmovies.org/eternal-sunshine-of-the-spotless-mind

It made me wonder

If I had the ability to delete bad memories from my mind such as the ones I have of my Mother

Would I

What if I had a completely clean slate about her to build new memories

As if the only thing I knew about her was that she gave birth to me

As I was taping the photo to the Caribbean fruity smelling turquoise colored candle I bought her

The first gift I’ve gotten her in a long time

It felt only right as she is letting me stay with her right now temporarily while attempt to

GET MY SHIT TOGETHER

Something you’re expected by the world to magically do immediately after a very difficult divorce

I forced myself to remember all of the good memories I had of her

It was challenging in the beginning to do this exercise

Eventually I was able to think of more than the times she took me to the Fox theater to see

Herbie Hancock and Wynton Marsalis

Or all the times she has bought me things or saved my azzz in a pinch

It’s tough to do that when those same memories are associated with all those times she kindly reminded you of doing those nice things for you and you start to wish you never accepted those tainted gifts

In the movie Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

The main character Joel is forced to do a similar exercise

His bad and most traumatic thoughts about his mother were darn near erased

Stuffed in the basement of his mind

Which reminds me of Inception

Another great movie I highly recommend

You can also watch it for free here… http://vexmovies.org/inception

One of my favorite scenes that I could relate to is Joel under a kitchen table and feeling invisible

He suddenly recalls how bad that really hurt him and bothered him at the tender age of four

I’ve felt like Joel my entire life

I actually can relate to aspects of Clementine’s character more than Joel’s but I’ll save that for one of my fun poetic movie reviews

My oldest daughter once said to me as a four year old that no one understands her

I know exactly what she was trying to say now

Even then I did not fully get it

I’m sure Katt Williams would just call me a beech azzz ninja that needs to man up

Or to many my Senior I’m sure I come across right now as another whiny complaining millennial

Through all of my recent research on dreaming and how the mind works

I’m realizing that I have experienced a lot of trauma

I’ve noticed that the average person tends to generally downplay their trauma because we compare ours to the trauma of others

Or how badly things could have been as though that makes up for how dysfunctional your childhood actually was growing up and how negatively it’s all affecting you now as an adult because you happily rehearsed this crazy excuse in your head like a broken record

Sigh…

I remember my big bro telling me one time that I should be thankful we had two parents as black men

Plus the roof over our head and the things that they could afford because they both had good jobs

What I’m basically attempting to say in this long azzz rant

Is that I still have lots of emotional conflict on this day

I wrote this two page note to my Mom that listed all of these positive memories I had of her

Then it turned slightly negative and I mentioned my Pop who she is now divorced from

I opted to just give her the candle and not the note

The whole time I was writing the note

I kept thinking that I need to find a way to let my Mom know how I really feel

That somehow expressing my negative emotions of her would improve our relationship

That I could begin to rewrite the bad narrative of her that I had formed in my head over the years

Most of all

I kept thinking of all the regrets I might have after she dies someday

I don’t know

For now

Like the members of A.A. say along with their prayer of Serenity

I can only take things one second

Minute

Hour

Day at a time

Including the fact that Mother’s Day also brings up memories of my ex-wife

Our would be twelfth wedding anniversary only seven days away

Recalling the times we all went out with her Mom for brunch after church on this day

That’s what sucks about having kids with someone

After the breakup or divorce

It’s difficult to erase them from your brain and get over all of the pain

Every single thing in life is constantly reminding you of that person

The kids you made together are like the pictures you tried to tear and burn

But they regenerate every time

Anyway

I will do my best today to remember that this day is about Mom

And not about me

I will most likely try to dodge going with her to church in the morning

After that

I will do my best to make at least one memory together

Or

Alternatively

I’ve also given myself the right for the sake of my own mental health to take baby steps

The Caribbean fruity smelling turquoise colored candle with this photo of us shall suffice

For now LOL

Happy Mother’s Day everyone

 

mothers day candle

 

 

Journaling provides FOUR LIFE CHANGING Benefits

  1. Decreased anger and anxiety
  2. Simple A-B Testing
  3. You are more in the moment AKA “present”
  4. Increased self-awareness

👇🏾👇🏾👇🏾 Click the link below for full article 👇🏾👇🏾👇🏾

First Ever Post on Medium.com

4:53 AM 5.10.2019

There was a strange sound coming from the walls

I was curious

Decided to investigate

Only to discover

Not above or below

But the neighbors next door

Some lucky brutha or stranger

Probably named Dick

Or Harry

Had scored

This was a rare occurrence

Does not seem to happen very often

Not that I’m waiting

Each and every evening or morning

Eavesdropping

Hoping for another show

I hope my kids don’t read this stuff

At least until they are at least eighteen

It’s very strange

As I remember a time very recently

When they could not even read

Let alone speak English

The wonderful age of innocence

My ex-wife and I could talk about anything

Without whispering

My oldest daughter is sooo nosy

I’m sure she currently knows so many things

Like providing Daddy intel on Mommy’s new boyfriend

But unfortunately

Mommy has given these kids tons of coaching

Even the slowest witted one

I won’t say who

Would not dare spill the beans

Threatened I’m sure

With the most memorable of ass whoopings

Yes

I said whoopings

Not whippings

I should be sleeping currently

But

It’s not easy

This new life is

Slightly

Well honestly

Very depressing

I’ve been watching tons of stand-up comedy

To liven my spirits

One of which was

Tambourine

By Chris Rock

He discusses his divorce

His experience in court

And what it’s like dating

I could totally relate

It makes me want to write another book

Shit

Two books

The first one

Working title

Things I wish I knew before I got married

The second one

Things I wish I knew after I got divorced

Maybe they will become bestsellers

A brutha needs to get caught up on child support

I really don’t want to get another job

It’s looking like I’m going to have to

Ma ain’t goin’ to let a grown man

Live in this back room

Too much longer

As Mr. Rock’s grandma said

A broke man is like a broke hand

Aint good for shit

Or something like that

I would actually consider myself very wealthy

Just not in the traditional American sense of the word

You would think the possibility of jail

Or a desire to be a provider for my kids

Or a desire to be able to afford my own place

Or a million other reasons that normal

Rational

Human beings would consider

Would push and motivate me to better

Truth is

I don’t give a fuck about shit these days

Call me selfish or a bunch of other names

I have officially hit rock bottom

And luckily had a safety net in Ma

Waiting to catch me

Big bro offered his as well

On a one way ticket to Houston

With a brief layover in Atlanta

I’ll explain further later

For now

The same questions spin

If we must stay in Misery

Specifically Kansas City

What is our plan

Like the number of licks it takes

To enter the center

Of a tootsie roll pop

The world

May never

Know

© 2019 Aaron J. Yancey

All rights reserved